


'Lili'

by Krambi003



Category: Finder no Hyouteki | Finder Series
Genre: Crack, Cross-Posted on LiveJournal, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-10-08
Updated: 2014-10-08
Packaged: 2018-02-20 09:29:18
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 626
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2423720
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Krambi003/pseuds/Krambi003
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Sunday morning, bored Akihito decides to have some fun while his man is still asleep in the bedrroom...</p>
            </blockquote>





	'Lili'

_Viewfinder_ and its characters © Yamane Ayano

 **Characters:** Takaba Akihito... and a "special guest" (+ short appearance of Asami)  
 **Rating:** G  
 **Warning:** CRACK, Unbeta'ed

~~~

Akihito, pleased to have managed to steal it from Asami's nightstand without the older male to wake up, puts his "special guest" on the sofa.

His back to the sofa, with a spatula in his hand, Akihito looks straight to the TV set and whispers.

"I am Takaba Akihito, live from Asami Ryuichi's condo to expose for you only, dear viewers, this dangerous man's secrets thanks to the help of the one that spends quite 24 hours a day with him.... "Lili" To ensure the safety of our special guest, we of course use a pseudonym and will alter their voice. Ladies and Gentlemen, let's start our exclusive interview and finally get to know the _naked truth behind the smirk_!"

Aki sits on the edge of the coffee table and starts the funny ballet of his spatula, talking into it to ask his questions and stretching it to his special guest to get the answers.

"Good Morning, Lili."

"Yo! It's Lili- **san** for you, _brat_."

Akihito clears his throat.

"So, Lili- _san_ , first question to get to know you better before talking about your boss: are you male or female?"

"None of your business."

"Haha OK so let's say female."

"No way!!!!"

"OK, so **Mr.** Lili, how would you describe your job?"

"Hey _dummy_ , I told you it's Lili- **san** for you. My job is great."

"Aaah haha my bad... Ahem Lili- _san_ , could you describe more precisely what you do for Asami?"

"Light."

"His cigarette?"

"99% of the time yes."

"Pretty logical for a [lighter](http://darbay.ru/images/a1e6b9d25d88dd5f7dd68ec1ef6cd5f2.jpeg). And the 1% left?"

"Anything he wants me to set on fire. Sheet of paper, photo, mosquito..."

"Mosquito?"

"Hum... I said mosquito?"

"Yes, you did!"

"Really?"

"Yes!!"

"Forget... believe me you'd better forget."

"Ah..."

"Next!"

Takaba clears his throat again.

"How long has it been since you work for Asami?"

"I met Asami-sama for his sixteenth birthday."

"Sixteenth bi-bi-birthday?"

"Hehe yes, _brat_. Not even his favourite gun has been at his side for as long as me!"

"Nyah nyah nyah nyah for as long as me pffff"

"Any other question, _jealous boy_?"

"How many official lovers had Asami?"

"None of your business."

"And non-official?"

"None of your business."

"Oh so you do not know at all. Well it's no surprise. After all, you are not spending each and every of the 24 hours of a day with him."

"I am with Asami-sama when he wakes up and when he gets dressed. When he eats and when he works alone or has meetings, when he has some free time, reads the newspapers and until he goes to bed."*

"Okay 'kay. So if you are soooo always with him, one thing you surely knows, Lili- _san_ : does Asami wash his hair or body first when he showers?"

"How would I know? I wait for him in his bedroom."

Akihito turns around and winks to the TV set as he says.

"Alright so thanks to you, Lili- _san_ , we have learned quite nothing about Asami except that he smokes quite every minute he does not sleep... but not in his bath."

"Because I never take baths."

Asami grabs his lighter and puts it in his bathrobe's pocket, then grabs his lover before he can escape and throws him on his shoulder and heads back to his bedroom, while Akihito talks into his spatula one last time.

"Sorry Ladies and Gentlemen, it seems we lack of time to dig any further and finally discover the whole _naked truth behind the smirk_! Please, tell my family and friends that I love them. It was Takaba Akihito, live from Asami Ryuichi's condoooo...."

 

The End


End file.
